Thursday, February 21, 2008

Like huge, godzilla sized disgusting!

Disgusting on an epic scale!
But oh so hollywood...

I was watching tv (first mistake) and a commercial for Bally's came on.

Let me give you the back story on Bally's.

Back when I first decided to start training full time, I was a babe in the woods, so I checked out everyone. The employment section of the Bally's website indicated that you could get hired as a trainer with no certification as long as you attained said cetification (still not worth a damn) in 90 days?
Are you freaking kidding me?! That told me everything I needed to know on that count.

So I'm watching tv and a commercial for Bally's comes on. Of course it's like a moving picture of my own private hell. Then there is this one part that really burrowed it's way into my psyche. It's this high school drop out girl jumping up and down yelling through one of those little cardboard cheerleader megaphones at some guy doing some sort of exercise or something.

Really Bally's? Really?
Let's talk. I feel like I kind of need to take you to the curb and maybe help you with your completely twisted view of just what goes on in a gym. I know it's not you, it's the advertising department. Whatever it is, I hate to think that my clients will be dissappointed when I don't whip out a megaphone and start ranting through it about sucking the belly button into the spine.

Short story: The fitness industry hates you. They will gladly pave the way to the bank with your broken bodies. There is no reason to join a coporate gym ever.
I have two Gym Memberships. Equinox (because it was free), and Diesel in Burlingame. Diesel is closer to what we're mostly looking for as it looks like an underfunded highschool gym, they have bumper plates, and they let me bring kettlebells in.

If you're looking for a point to this post, stop looking. File this under 'rants'.


  1. Jordan,

    When I first decided to train people for a living, I worked at Gold's Gym... It's a franchise so, maybe there are some quality gyms out there. However, most of the trainers at the gym I worked at, were a danger to their clients, themselves and those around them.

    It was a pleasure meeting you last weekend! Enjoy your KB workshop this weekend! I'm envious!

  2. Thanks Fawn, it was nice meeting you too. :)
    Yeah, I once broke it down to about 50% of trainers are competent, 25% are good, and 25% are actively endangering their client's lives.
    That may even be too generous. I think some of the trainers I've seen are even somehow endangering people in South America.

  3. catching up on your old posts. have you seen P90X infomercials? Do you know the program? I've heard good things and I'd like to get a professional take.

  4. As far as the infomercial exercise things go it's not bad, but it is essentially crossfit, and since crossfit is free and more effective, I always recommend people go with crossfit.
    The other problem with all those infomerical exercise things is they use all sorts of trickery to make it look better than it is. Of course my suggestion is to order up a kettlebell and swing it. :)
    Thanks for asking.

  5. Thanks, crossfit looks great. Some common elements with P90X. I'll check it out. Looks like there is a kettlebell component.

    I do kettlebell as part of my current program. Getting better, but moving slowly. The worst part is impact soreness on my wrists and forearms. I'm not banging into my bone, but I am thin skinned. I can't even play volleyball without suffering, but I'm loving it so far.

  6. I've had some clients with hypersensitive forearms, and I have them use wristbands. I would also recommend that if you're relatively new to the kettlebells, stick to swings and Turkish Get Ups until you're tight with those and your strength and conditioning are much better. Either 30 seconds on/ 30 seconds off with swings or 45 seconds on and 15 seconds off. If you're not banging out a boatload of swings, you're missing some of the conditioning benefits.

  7. Cool. Thanks.

    Reminds me of the old joke ...

    Doctor, it hurts when I hit my arm with the kettlebell ...

    BTW, I have friends who train at Bally's and Gold's. Some good and some bad. Their training/certification is crap in any case.

  8. Agreed, it's a mixed bag. I started training at Equinox, and that was fortunate as they have kettlebells and other functional training tools that helped me get on the right path. Other chain gyms, not so much.

  9. My buddy recommended these wrist guards from Lisa Shaffer ...

    What do you think?

  10. I would say to stick with wristbands. $5 vs. $15. Also, my clients who had hypersensitive forearms eventually became acclimated to it and were able to dispense with the wrist bands.

  11. Thanks. Seems better now after I laid off for a while. I think my technique was the problem early on and my arms never had a chance to recover.